I turn 20 tomorrow. I've got my feet off guard. I have no idea about what or how life is going to take its course. I feel stuck. I want to lie down, take my beer and not move for hours on some clean beach, probably.
I was never as panicked as I was when I turned 16, 17, 18 or 19, but weirdly, the thought of two numbers changing is just something going down my brain negatively.
This year, I've decided what I want to do. This year, I've decided how I want to be.
I have an idea of writing things down. I would have posted them on this blog, but then I'm not ready yet. Family reads this (?). Random people who just *know* about me read this. I don't give one fuck about social acceptance, but then there are a few things I have to always think about.
TOO.MUCH.PRESSURE.
Anyway, happy birthday to me. I should smile now.
P.S: Easy with my birthday being on Valentine's Day, world.
I was never as panicked as I was when I turned 16, 17, 18 or 19, but weirdly, the thought of two numbers changing is just something going down my brain negatively.
This year, I've decided what I want to do. This year, I've decided how I want to be.
I have an idea of writing things down. I would have posted them on this blog, but then I'm not ready yet. Family reads this (?). Random people who just *know* about me read this. I don't give one fuck about social acceptance, but then there are a few things I have to always think about.
TOO.MUCH.PRESSURE.
Anyway, happy birthday to me. I should smile now.
P.S: Easy with my birthday being on Valentine's Day, world.
Happy birthday :D :D :D
ReplyDeleteAnd my big two-zero...well,let's just call it dooms day is exactly nine months from yours!
ReplyDeleteP.S - Hope this comment helped,since i ain't family or a known friend!